Falling Short

Over the past week I have been scrambling to keep my head above water. I knew it would happen, that the list would be longer than I could possibly manage but the madness seems to be hitting so much earlier than I remember and it has taken me a bit off guard.

In the midst of all the scrambling I have unintentionally let this space slip and it’s really eating away at me. Last fall when I set out to document life here on “the farm” I had a personal goal of posting consistently, every weekday, no matter what. And up until last week I successfully met my goal.

I had no idea how much this simple act would transform the way I see the world. Now instead of blowing through days, rushing from one task to the next, I am much more thoughtful, always looking and seeing in a different way. The process has changed me in ways I couldn’t imagine.

With the absence of posting for just a few days, my world seems somewhat less alive, and my approach, much less intentional. So while things are kicking into high gear around here and I have no idea how I’ll keep everything balanced, I am determined to find a way to have it all.

Yesterday I harvested the first Tulips. The first hour of picking quite dull and lonely but after I found my rhythm, where I stopped having to think about my next move and my body just took over, this amazing groundedness washed over me. With so much time the past few months huddled in the house thinking, planning and plotting I had forgotten how much being outside, in nature, with the flowers helps me find my center.